Back Home
Can you believe this year’s Lent season is already more than halfway to Easter? This season of hungering for Christ is almost complete in the marking of Jesus’ torture, death, and resurrection back home.
This Easter season, there is no better reminder of my transplant anniversary than that dreary day: Valentine’s Day landing on Ash Wednesday this year. You could read more about my Valentine’s Day track record HERE.
This Lent season, I came up with an array of things I could rid myself of, so that my gaze could be on Jesus. Some of them were social media, carbs, sugar, sitting, and being negative.
Given the first anniversary of my transplant, I knew I’d have to be very gentle and graceful towards the ebbs and flows of my emotions. Therefore, instead of a Lent season focusing on depriving myself in observance of Jesus’ sacrifice and redemption, I shifted my mindset to adding Jesus into my everyday life.
As I’ve taken time to reflect on each day of last year’s transplant and hospital experience mentioned HERE, I drew my attention to hungering for God’s character.
By no mistake, God’s hand has been on the sum of anniversaries in my life falling between Love Day and Easter. The true beauty of death to life during the season of Lent.
Relationship heartbreak -> My life is so better off
Arriving in Africa -> Home and no more jet lag
We hired someone else -> Back to teaching as a sub
Winter days -> Almost 70 degrees
Single -> Engaged
“Amy, you have cancer.” -> Here comes the chemotherapy
Arrive for my transplant -> Discharge and see my kids again
This shift of unknown to God’s faithfulness tends to magnify at this time of year. They all stick out as much as the drastic rearrangement of decor in my home from blood, red to bright sunshine.
Never do I want to forget the one, true, absolute love Jesus shed with His own life for the restoration of my sins, and hope to be with Him forever.
Love Day and Easter collide at its finest!
And you can accept this love gift too. Or if you already have, you can remember this glorious gift today.
Here’s my confession. Life has felt like a blur. For most people, I think we can all feel like life before Covid is a blur, but unfortunately for my four year old son and growing daughters the past three years have been foggy. Life with chronic health issues yielded a fast pace, going from this place to that place, getting a sitter, rushing kids to bed kind of drill.
Existing and moving in the midst of fatigue, pain, sleep deprivation, and an array of inputs from the opinions of doctors and loved ones was simply where I lost myself. My focus turned into:
How can I please my family? VS -> How can I please my God?
Will this get me closer to a cure? VS -> God, you are sovereign over my life regardless of the status of my health.
Hubby, just be present with me. VS -> Holy Spirit, you see me and you are constantly with me.
How can I distract myself with business? VS -> Okay God, the quiet, slow, not moving and attacking my to do list warrant time with you.
Why would people fall away and not want to do life with my mess? VS -> You never shy away from my mess. You choose to always be with me.
I want to grow old and live forever. I don’t want my kids and husband to live without me. VS -> Have your way with my life Lord. You are good at being God. You know exactly the kind of life each of us will have.
Author and speaker Jennie Allen reminded me on her Instagram of the symbolism of Lent and confirmed the conviction: I was clenching on to my life. She cuts through the pain, “Today is Ash Wednesday. The day we collectively remember we are simply dust to dust, our lives but a breath… A perfect day to remember success here- it’s vapor, dust, breath.” Flourishing on earth and a successful stem cell transplant is a vapor. Just water meeting heat, no big deal.
I went into the Lent season gripping my future, in dismay that I had no control. “For dust you are and to dust you will return” (Genesis 3:19 NIV).
This Easter season, in light of a Lent season from home versus a hospital residency, I’m embracing the gift of gold He gives me EVERYDAY.
2-14-23 to 3-3-23, thank you for healing my body. I don’t miss you.
2-14-24 to 3-3-24, God you showed up a year ago, and you continue to show up!
Today’s Gold: Eventually being at home with Jesus, but until then, snuggled up with my crew.
Our Family’s Favorite Easter Traditions:
Resurrection Egg countdown to Easter - We countdown to Easter with a dozen symbols that remind us of the Easter story. I hide an egg each day and it’s our favorite adult and kid friendly way to dig deeper into the meaning of Easter.
Washing of Feet - Just like Jesus washed His disciples feet, we wash one another’s feet. If we have loved ones over, we wash their feet. If we fought earlier that day, we still wash each other’s feet. We humbly wash despite reality, and remember to extend love, service, and forgiveness to the people around us.
Decorating Eggs - There’s no greater holiday pastime than convincing myself I will finally be able to add words to a decorated egg.
What part of Lent is impactful for you? I’d love to know some of your favorite Easter traditions too!
